Monday, July 03, 2006

Can U Believe this Shit

30 wins.

21 games under .500.

14 and a half games out of first place.

Two pitchers with winning records.

Two hitters with over 40 RBI.

They say that numbers don’t lie. There right.

When looking over the Cubs statistics for this ‘Report Card’, I expected to see a team filled with slumping players who were either A) Not ready to perform every day at a Major League lever, B) Too old to be expected to perform every day at a Major League level, or C) Injured players who didn’t have a chance to perform every day at a Major League level. And while there are certain players on the roster that do fit in to these particular categories, most of the Cubs fit in to a forth criteria D) Bad baseball players who were performing at there usual Major League level. Without getting into specifics right now, here’s how Dusty’s crew graded out for the first 81 games.

I am only grading hitters who have over 85 at bats or pitchers with 28 or more innings pitched.
----------A----------

Nobody…. (Imagine if this were High School and the valedictorian of Wrigley Field Township HS finished with a Ferris Bueler-like 2.8 GPA)


----------B----------

Scott Eyre- By far the best of our relievers and maybe the best free agent acquisition Jim Hendry has ever gotten. With a .211 ERA, a 3.15 strikeout-to-walk ratio and only four home runs allowed, it is obvious that Eyre is too talented to be a Cub for much longer. I think Dusty Baker may be the only person who watches the Cubs every day that doesn’t realize that this guy should be the teams closer.

Carlos Zambrano- He started off the year slowly, but recently he’s been damn near unhittable. Sixth in the National League in ERA for starting pitchers, first in strikeouts, but yet only six wins. A lot of that has to do with a lack of run support for Big Z, who even helped himself with a three run homer last week versus Milwaukee. He should be an All-Star.

Michael Barrett- The Cross-town Beat down aside, Barrett has played well for the Cubs this year. His .307 batting average leads the team, and this is while he has batted in almost every spot in Dusty’s always changing hitting order. His D is sometimes shaky, but he has earned the support of the Wrigley faithful and has quietly become one of the top backstops in the National League.

Jacque Jones- I gotta admit, I didn’t like the Jones signing. Nothing against JJ, since he is a solid hitter, but I didn’t think giving a 31 year old whose power numbers have declined the past few seasons a three year contract was very smart. But to his credit, he has performed well and has been by far the most clutch of all the Cubs. (which is like saying Seth Myers is the funniest guy on SNL, but hey, it’s something) All that being said, I hope they shop Jones over the winter and go after a true power hitting corner outfielder.

----------C----------

Greg Maddux- If only the season were one month, Maddux would have been an obvious choice to be an A-student. Mad Dog was 5-0 with a 1.35 ERA in April and looked to be an All-Star game lock. Two months later his record is under .500 (7-8) and his ERA is almost 5 (4.94). For Maddux’s sake, I hope he gets dealt to a contender so he can pitch in some meaningful games this year.

Bob Howry---The Good: In 40 relief appearances, Howry’s ERA has been a solid 3.38. The Bad: But it seems like whenever he’s called on to get a big out, he fails to do so. Still, Bobby is better then previous eight inning setup men we’ve had. (Farnsworth, six fingered Alf, Latroy)

Carlos Marmol---Considering that a month ago most Cub fans had never heard of Marmol, this is a pretty generous grade. Little C, as I like to call him, has pitched well as a starter, though eventually he will be placed back in the bullpen I believe. Dusty has also found out that he’s a pretty good pinch runner as well.

Todd Walker---He’s hitting almost .300, has been a versatile defender by playing both positions on the right side of the infield and is leading the team in walks. But T-Walk didn’t hit well when Derek Lee was out, and that was when we really needed him most. I imagine that this will be Walker’s last few months in the blue pinstripes.

Aramis Ramirez---Another player that failed to live up to expectations when Lee was out, Ramirez has struggled to reproduce the power numbers he put up in 2005. Still he leads the club in home runs (15) and RBI (48). Lets hope he can put together a HUGE second half.

Ronny Cedeno- His .273 average is not bad for the usual number eight hitter, especially for one in his first full major league season. And I think that Cedeno is one of those players the Cubs need to keep and have him become one of the building blocks for the future. But his 12 errors and only five steals is definitely a huge concern.

Hennery Blanco---Good old Hank White. It’s not often that the backup catcher is a big fan favorite, but when you have a team full of players that are unskilled and disliked, the fans have to cheer for somebody. Blanco has 16 RBI, six of which came during a pair of games in Cleveland.

----------D----------

Sean Marshall- Ouch, a D for Marshall’s first semester in the show. (Trust me, it’s tough to get that GPA up after starting off the year with a bad grade) Though the young lefty has thrown over 86 innings (third on the team) and has yet to suffer some type of outrageous arm injury, which is an accomplishment in itself, he gets his grade because of his 50 runs allowed, 42 walks given up, and the fact that opposing hitters are hitting .257 against him (a higher BA then the Cubs team average).

Roberton Novoa- I hate to say it because I think he’s a good pitcher, but Novoa has become Dusty’s token non-white guy in the bullpen, (Following in the hallowed footsteps of Juan Cruz, Antonio Alfonseca and Latroy) meaning his career is pretty much as worthless as a Marcus Fizer jersey. Allowing nine home runs in 38 innings also may be one of the reasons Novoa will be searching for a new job on 1AD. (After Dusty)

Will Ohman- Oh man. Where do I start with this guy? How about the 30 hits in 34 and a third innings. Or the 14 walks for a pitcher who usually only comes in the game to face one or two guys. Don’t forget that 15 of the 17 runs he’s allowed have been at Wrigley Field.

Juan Pierre- He almost hit for the cycle last week versus the Sox. He is second in the National League in stolen bases. And he stuck up for the fans when the bleacher bums pelted the field with trash last week. But for the first two and a half months of the year, Pierre sucked more then a vacuum cleaner. It appears he’s turning it around, as shown by the 23 runs the team has scored the past three days, and may be able to bring in some nice players if traded at the end of the month.

Matt Murton- The young redhead has been great against lefty’s, hitting .333. But that’s only 72 at bats. In his other 159 trips to the plate, against fellow right-handers, Murton is hitting a Todd Hundley-esque .239. Like I said with Jacque Jones, the Cubs will need to get some corner outfielder that can hit for power, since Murton’s four homers and 22 RBI are not really cutting it.

----------F----------

Ryan Dempster- Squeeze your eyes tight and try and remember when Dempster was reliable, dependable and able to get batters out. Reminisce when he mowed down hitters while making everyone laugh with his goofy comedy. Think about when he went over 31 innings without letting up a run. Alright, you can stop thinking now, because it’s all in the past. Now Dempster is about as reliable as a Cracker Jack tattoo. A 1-5 record with a 5.05 ERA, Dempster should take the first ‘e’ out of his name, put in a ‘u’ and toss himself right in.

Glendon Rusch- Can you believe that this guy was out number two starter to begin the season? He’s 2-7 with an ERA near 8. He’s third in the National League in home runs allowed with 17… and he has only pitched 47 innings. Two of those long balls came in back to back starts versus the Reds when Cincinnati starter Bronson Arroyo hit his first and second home runs of his career. If he’s still on the team next season, it will prove how serious Jim Hendry’s brain problems are.

Neifi Perez- What’s more annoying, the way Neifi bunts in the ninth inning of games or the fact that he still has a Major League roster spot? Maybe it’s just me, but I always thought that guys who weren’t good were supposed to sit on the bench, not play in two-thirds of the games and bat second. Neifi would be by far the worst player on the team if it weren’t for…

John Mabary - First off, you’re not Mark Grace. You can’t hit like him, you can’t field like him, and you can’t play at all like the real #17. Second, I find it hilarious how Mabary seems to disappear for about two weeks, and then Dusty remembers he’s on the team and plays him for two games in a row, and then sends him back to the bench. Third is, how did this guy hit so well for the Cardinals last year and now can barley hit over .210?

----------No Credit----------

These guys’s didn’t play enough to get a grade:
Marc Prior, Kerry Wood, Scott Williamson, pretty much the entire Iowa Cubs AAA pitching staff, Derek Lee, Freddy Bynum, Angel Pagan, Tony Womack, and Phil Nevin.



So will the last 81 games be as bad as the first? It can’t be much worse, but when you’re dealing with the Chicago Cubs, you just never know.

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